Degrading Lyrics Make Teens Want To "Do It"

Or so says a recent study. Researcher Dr. Brian A. Primack believes that teens exposed to "raunchy" music are more likely to emulate what they hear, often leading to copulation. I conducted my own survey - here's what I found: teens are more likely to have sex when they combine abstinence-only sex "education" with flowing hormones and (often) alcohol. They are teens, therefore lots of bad music is playing in the background! I can't imagine some kid pausing his iPod and thinking, "Hmmm.... so&so was just singing about fucking. I should probably try that now." Where is my cushy job as a college level professor and why is this guy getting paid to spend his days interviewing 9th graders about their sexual practices?