Brad Pitt Goes All Jude Law On His Nanny's Ass

I, much like Jennifer Aniston, have given up hope of ever having Brad Pitt returned to me in the same condition as when I used to fantasize about him. Daddy Brad is just not the same as Legends of the Fall Brad. Angelina Jolie seems hellbent on using him up, spitting him out and sucking all the prettiness out of him while she's at it. The latest scandal? Brad rubbed the nanny's back in order to comfort her! What did Angie do? Slapped him across the face, of course! I wish this were true, but given the source it seems a little unlikely. I should clarify - it's not that I'd be happy to learn Brad had been slapped across the face by his lover. Rather, if this actually happened, it might finally be enough of a catalyst to get Brad to move on. However, Angie's too crafty to lose her cool and do something as overt as a slap across the face. Plus, she wouldn't go after Brad. She'd be the kind to slowly drive the nanny crazy with tortuous mental gymnastics, until the poor girl ran screaming from the house. Meanwhile, Star Magazine asserts that Shiloh has developed an imaginary friend named Amy - whom she enjoys more than her siblings! The only thing imaginary about this situation are the cooked up stories - not that I don't get a kick out of it all...