Kate Gosselin is claiming a "clean slate." Apparently this new beginning comes with new hair - in the form of obvious extensions. Some of us kick off January with simple dietary things like not drinking or putting an end to cheese abuse. Sure, you may feel like shooting yourself - but your liver and colon are cheering! Others, it appears, choose to line Paris Hilton's pockets and invest in Dream Catchers. To each her own. Details from Fox News 411, via Celebitchy:

[It's not that we didn't want to like Kate Gosselin's new look on the cover of People magazine, where she triumphantly declares "I'm starting over." But as human beings with functioning eyeballs, we simply couldn't get past the terrible look of her new long hair weave, complete with highlights and short layers.

And while we never thought this was possible, it appears her new hair is, shockingly, worse than the porcupine cut for which she has become famous. Not only does it look horribly fake, but Gosselin still seems to have the same short cut as always, only this time she has one massive hair-piece attached to the back of it.

"It's good to have hair again," Kate tells People. "I never thought I'd have short hair for as long as I did. I feel like this is a fresh start, a fresh me, a fresh life." Later, she refers to herself as the new "Kate Clean Slate." "I'm rebuilding. There's no option for this not to be a good year. Now I get to start over with a new self and new goals."]

I love that she puts her name first in front of "clean slate" - despite the fact that, as Celebitchy pointed out, "Clean Slate Kate" flows much better. Kate, you can glue all the extra human hair to your skull that you want - it still will not erase the dirty of a decade of sexual intercourse with Jon Gosselin. Sure, Skeevemeister kept it in his pants for the majority of your union - but he was always lurking...

[People Magazine Cover]

Kate Gosselin: From Porcupine To Mullet

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