Jessica Simpson, put down the pet pig! Seriously. Jess is in desperate need of a P.R. intervention. Does she even have an agent anymore - or is her dad/creep/manager just winging it here? Jessica adopting a pig is just too damn easy - the jokes are going to earn overtime on writing themselves. In between the "sexual napalm," being dissed by nearly every guy she's ever dated and farting in a business meeting - isn't it time to wedge in some good press? Please?
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