State The Obvious

I'm in Chicago and it's hot - brutally, sweatily, insanely hot. I mean, what was I expecting? It's June; the sun is out and the humidity refuses to become friends with my hair. And, on top of it all, I have a confession to make - in this brief moment, I am jealous of Gwyneth Paltrow. Yes, I actually wish to be in the shoes of my long-time nemesis right now. You GOOP subscribers know Gwynnie recently traveled to the Windy City and posted her usual rash of exclusive "in the know" hip spots. Now that I'm here, I want to go to all of them... in her style. I want to be squired around in an air-conditioned town car, stay at the fanciest hotel and have the hip & cool on speed dial. Instead I'm walking for miles when I'm not on public transport, staying in the filthy attic apartment of a place we found on Craig's List (which features one window cooler for use during this heat wave) and we're frequenting dive bars because I'm too sweaty and disheveled to go anywhere else. You might never hear me say this again, but maybe Gwyneth is onto something! Damn.